Ricin . . .

~Castor Plant ~

I have recently found a Castor Plant near where I live and have (carefully) taken some samples of the seeds.This is what I know about the plant I have found, from books and the internet ~


Ricin is a stable toxin easily made from the mash that remains after processing Castor beans (Ricinus communis) for oil. The beans are not normally used as food. 
Poisoning can occur following inhalation, ingestion, or injection of ricin toxin from Castor beans.

~

Eating Castor beans or ricin-contaminated material causes diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, abdominal cramps, internal bleeding, liver and kidney failure, and circulatory failure. Rapid heartbeat can also occur. 
If the castor beans are swallowed whole, the poisoning will be less severe than if the beans are chewed. Breathing dust that contains ricin causes cough, weakness, fever, nausea, muscle aches, difficult breathing, chest pain, respiratory and circulatory failure, and cyanosis (blue skin). ( I must be careful with this)
Injection of ricin toxin would likely result in tissue (muscle) necrosis near the injection site, probable multiple organ failure, and death.
All routes of exposure are very dangerous and can result in death
The time from exposure to ricin toxin to onset of symptoms can range from less than 1 hour to 12 hours or greater. Symptoms of poisoning from eating ricin-contaminated food or Castor beans can occur within 2-3 hours. Inhalation of ricin-contaminated particles can cause symptoms within 3 hours. Sometimes the symptoms can be delayed many hours.

~

~Ricin Seeds~

Antitoxins are not available for treatment of ricin poisoning. Hospital care is necessary to support the victim and treat the effects of ricin toxin.
In cases of severe ricin poisoning death can be caused by kidney failure, respiratory failure, circulatory collapse, or fluid loss.

Doubt. . .

“Doubt that the stars are fire, doubt that the sun doth move, doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love.”


William Shakespeare~

The Myth of Medusa -

Medusa, along with her sisters, Stheno and Euryale, were the Gorgon daughters of the sea Titans Porcys and Ceto.Medusa wasn't always hideous. There is a particular myth in which Medusa was originally a beautiful maiden with long silky hair that she was very proud of.


Once said to have been extremely wise they all served as priestesses to the virgin goddess of wisdom, Athena. However, the Seagod Poseidon desperately desired Medusa. In a moment of raw passion he raped Medusa inside of Athena's temple of worship. In anger, the three sisters became petty and vindictive toward men.
Appalled either by the sisters' pettiness, or by the sacrilegious sexual act, Athena transformed Medusa and her sisters (all of whom were now wicked) into hideous beasts with scaly skin, dragon's wings and hair formed of dozens of coiling snakes. As a result, all who beheld the Gorgons were instantly turned to stone when their eyes met.
Medusa and her sisters became even more vicious and took great pleasure in torturing their victims until the day when Perseus, with the help of Athena and Hermes. Using the winged sandals and Hades' helmet of invisibility provided by Hermes, and Athena's silver shield, Perseus approached the sleeping Medusa.
Perseus killed the monster by looking at her reflection on his shield, which prevented him turning into stone. He cut off her head and presented it to Athena, who placed it in the center of her Aegis, the protective shield which she wore over her breastplate.
But first, Perseus had to outrace Medusa's enraged sisters, who flew after him, the snakes on their heads and waists hissing at his heels. Perseus managed to escape thanks to the winged sandals of Hermes, and by wearing Hades' helmet of invisibility.

Upon her death, the seeds of the union of Poseidon & Medusa germinated into the young colt named Pegasus and the giant (or another winged horse) named Chrysoar, who sprang forth when the blood of Medusa made contact with the seafoam. Perseus married the princess Andromeda and they had a daughter whom they called Gorgophone (named for the slain gorgon). Medusa was also identified with the Libyan Queen and serpent-goddess of wisdom of the Amazons. Her name is derived from the Sanskrit medha, Greek metis, and Egyptian met or maat all meaning "wisdom."

Dedicated to the girl in her cage...

Hi there, new follower,

 Im sorry I havn't welcomed you properly to my blog before haha

Welcome to my little corner of the world 

I hope you dont find it too depressing at times xD

Gah.

I hate dentists >_> I suspect they enjoy making me suffer.

I miss you

I havn't seen my darling for so long . . . 

I cant help counting down the days . . . 3 weeks still to go 

I havn't seen him since october . . . 

The distance kills me.

I'm remembering. 

We started to speak more than a year ago, various circumstances leading us to speak for the first time. The first time i spoke to my Darling it was on msn. We got to know eachother as much as anyone can on the internet 

and I saw that you were like me and I like you

I remember thinking that he was so diferent from anyone else I knew 

So different from the rest of the idiots in this world.

He sees the world in a different way and has changed me forever. 

Then you worked up the courage to buy a ticket. 

on the 7th of May I saw you in person for the very first time

and I remember thinking you were so beautifull. 

You were so shy, and so far away from home. The only person here that you knew was me and we had only ever talked online. 

We drove you to the hotel where you were going to stay to leave you bags and then we walked. 

And finaly, finaly after talking so much 

My darling kissed me for the first time and I was falling in love with him.

Five days later he was flying back home.

Soon he had the next visit booked

but this time my mam alowed him to stay at my house

this time he stayed for longer

19 days 

The best month of my life, spent every moment of it with my darling. 

It was so special 

The day you left I cried so much... 

I slept in the bed were you lay, where the pillow still smelt of you 

and I missed you so much...

He booked another flight

He would be spending Christmas with me in my home.

He would stay another 19 days with me 

But as time went on we found that christmas was so far away ... 

So another flight was booked for october 

A long weekend of 5 days my dalring stayed with me

and i was happy again

while it lasted. 

And now im waiting for Christmas to be with my Darling again 

to feel his arms wrap around me and make me feel safe and happy once more. 

I miss you so much. 

And next summer, at last i will be alowed to fly to visit you 

spend the whole summer with my darling 

I cant wait to go to visit you 

at last

All the way to Norway.

Nightmare . . .

Everything is so dark and cold . . .

I'm lying in my bed, shivering, knowing I have to get up for somthing

theres somthing I have to see....

I feel exhausted, my eyes ache so much

I have to get up

I dont know why but its so important

I manage to sit up and I gather my sheet around me trying to keep the cold from getting to me

but the room is so cold, I can hardly walk

like the room is full of ice

The cold reaches my bones and makes my whole body ache

All I want is to curl back in to bed and search for a little bit of warmth

But i know i have to get up

Shaking, barefoot I make my way across my room

The room is so dark... but i know this room so well

I get to the door but the door is all wrong

This is not my door

Its metal

Where am I ?

The handle is so cold it makes my fingers freeze but I manage to turn it and push the door open

I hope its wamer out here..

Behind the door, a long hallway

Just as cold but at least theres light

But so long . . .

I want to go back in to the dark room but I know I have to go somewhere

Still wraped in my blanket I make my way across the hall

But at every step I take the hall gets narower and narower. . .

untill the walls are brushing against my arms

I turn to go back

but right in front of me is a big solid wall

as if there was no hall behind me

and the only way I can go on is forward . . .

I carry on

Untill its so narow I cant breathe walking sideways

but everytime I turn back the wall is right behind me

and I know I have to go on

But Im so scared because the light is dimming and its so cold...

and the walls of the hall is squeezing the life out of me but there is still so much to walk

I know im going to die

because its so cold its killing me

I can hardly walk

I can hardly breathe

I feel my heartbeat srtuggle in my chest

and still the walls are crushing me . . .

Then I see the door

and I know this is the reason I had to get up

the door is warm under my fingers and I cant wait to get inside

I push the door and warmth comes out to meet me

Im saved I think

and I feel happy

And then I hear his voice...

my heart lifts and I think that nearly dying was worth it just to hear him laugh

but why is he laughing?

I look around

and at last I see him

so beautiful . . .

so perfect

I see his shirt on the floor by his feet

I see him lean over

and then I see her . . .

her top by his on the floor

and shes holding him

holding my darling

and they are so close.. their faces are so close . .

I know whats about to happen

and my soul rips open it hurts so much

I drop my sheet

slowly i walk back

and just as they kiss

I close the door

the cold hits me once more

it cripples me

but it hurts so much less than being in the warmth

And then I die.

I wake up gasping, and it takes me a while to remember that its only a dream... Its not true... It never happened...But I cant keep my heart from hammering in my chest so hard, and my breath caching in my throat...

And I feel so cold.